Rush
by krista2you
Summary: Mark comes back, can Addison resist? What will Derek do? Christina has a major secret. Cute MerDer scenes included.
1. Scenes 1 thru 21

VOICE OVER

We do things for the rush of the moment. We press the accelerator until we feel our stomach drop. We gulp back one more beer. Allow ourselves to get a little closer to a person then we had intended. When we were kids, it was enough to steal one more cookie then we knew we were allowed to have, then brag about it to our friends at lunch the next day. As we got to high school, it was the one beer at that party your parents could NEVER find out about. College, it was that boy, which you, well, got carried away with. As we grew, the things that gave us these little "rushes" changed. We still do them for the same reason, the little devil that sits on our shoulder tells us to. Our rebellious side comes out. For that one moment it feels like the wind is rushing in our face, and we are unstoppable.

SCENE 1

"Good surgery Derek," Meredith said, washing her hands.

"You did a pretty good job yourself, for performing this kind of a surgery for the first time."

Derek and Meredith walked out of the O.R. and down the hall towards the locker room. On their way there, their hands bump, and each of their hearts leapt in their stomach. Their eyes met for a brief moment, Derek's eye's shining with his longing to hold Meredith, her eyes missing him. They enter the locker room in silence, and Derek check's the messages on his phone.

"Addy got off early, and according to her message, is already in bed. Guess I'm on my own for dinner tonight. Want to grab a quick bite to eat?" Derek inquired.

Smiling and holding at her hand she says, "Seriously, would I be a friend if I said no?"

SCENE 2

"How are you feeling?" Izzie rushed in carrying a bag of warm, delicious smelling food. Her hair was done up, and she was wearing her favorite red button down, with matching earrings. Hearing her voice, Denny instantly smiled, and opened his eyes.

"Been better, been worse. What's in the bag? Am I allowed to eat what's in there?" Denny asked, sitting up slightly up in bed.

"Of course, what kind of a doctor would I be if I poisoned my own patient!" replied Izzie giggling.

The night wore on, and as the finished their meal, Izzie sat on Denny's hospital bed. After a few hours of talking, she laid her head on his shoulder. After a 30 hour shift and a glass of wine, Izzie had just fallen asleep next to her patient. She was so asleep that she didn't hear her phone softly ringing, the caller id: Alex.

SCENE 3  
Bailey enters the locker room, just after Christina. Christina had just laid down on the bench and closed her eyes.

"Yang, you need to check on my patient before you leave. Katharine Piers, 17, Female. Her chart is upstairs ."

"Alright, one second. (Mumbling) Great, just a teenaged brat to end my day."

"What was that Yang?"

Glancing downward, she quickly replies, "Nothing, I'll go, but I better get a good surgery soon. If I have to assist one more outpatient surgery, I might run Alex into a paper shredder, just to get some OR time."

"Now, I know we all want to run him through a sharp object, but doing so would get you kicked out of the program. Now get up there, and if I get one more side-comment from you, you won't see the inside of an O.R. for two weeks. MOVE!"

Scanning over her chart, Christina entered Katharine's room. Her father was asleep, with a worried expression on his face. Her mother was sitting in the chair, praying, silently moving her lips, a deep wrinkle showing in her forehead.

"Mr. and Mrs. Piers?"

"Actually it's just Mr. Piers, I'm Ms. Bellson now. We're divorced. "

"Oh, I am going to do a brief exam on Katharine and then we'll leave you alone for the night."

"My name is Kat."

"Excuse me?"

"I said, my name is Kat, are you stupid or something."

"Whatever, can I just examine you so I can go home."

Christina quickly does a basic exam, checks 'Kat's' labs, and other things.

"Nothing, as of yet, explains her seizure like activity yesterday. We will do tests tomorrow to find out more, but seeing the fact that she is stable, we can let her be tonight."

"So, she will probably be fine?" Ms. Bellson asked.

"I didn't say that, but I have to go."

Christina looked at Kat one more time, noticing her eyes were very red, and how skinny she was. Suddenly her stomach dropped. Ducking out of the room, Christina just wanted to get home and try to forget about the past that was flooding back towards her.

SCENE 4

Addison sat straight up in bed. Her phone was ringing loudly. Grumbling she picked up the phone.

"Derek, its past midnight, what could you possibly want? And wait, WHY AREN'T YOU HOME?"

"So, I see he hasn't left you for the intern. Yet."

"Mark? What are doing here?"

"I thought I'd come back for another visit. Strictly business."

"Seriously? What are you doing here? Are you trying to make things worse?"

"Your chief Dr. Webber called, he wanted me to come and help out for a bit. Like I said strictly business."

"Sure. If it's 'strictly business' why are you calling?"

"Well, I need picked up from the airport. Could you…?"

Addison quickly changed and got into the car, trying to make herself look the best she could. This was going to be a messy week.

Mer V.O.: And sometimes that rush is totally unexpected.

SCENE 5

George walks into patient's room. There is a young man lying on the bed. 14. Male. His parent's are yelling at him. There is a shy girl sitting on the couch, the same age as him. Nervously ripping a tissue to shreds. Tears are in her eyes.

"No, Ryan. You had so much going for you. How could you do something so STUPID!" The man who appeared to be Ryan's father yelled.

Ryan rolled his eyes.

George knocked on the door

"Mr. and Mrs. Anderson?"

The parent's looked up

"Umm, I'm Dr. George O'Malley. I am going to do a brief exam of your son. Could you tell me how this happened?"

Mrs. Anderson nervously looked at her husband. He started to tell the story as George began his examination.

"Ryan, our BRILLIANT son, decided he was going to show off in front of his little girl friend here. He made himself a ramp and tried to jump off of it with his brand new bike. Apparently, falling on your face is "cool" these days."

"Don't you DARE bring Allison into this." Ryan glared to his father. The girl on the couch flinched at her name.

"Ryan, she is the whole reason this happened. You have an audition this weekend. They'll never take you looking like that."

"Ryan is a singer. He is trying to get a contract." His mom sheepishly added. Tears were forming in her eyes.

"Dad, maybe this isn't all I want. Plus, you and mom already hired a plastic surgeon to fix my face, before we even got to the hospital you were already calling people all over the country to make sure my face was okay. I swear all you ever care about is making sure I'm famous."

Meanwhile, George finishes his exam. "Well, other than the fact that Ryan's face is cut severely, he will be okay. You said he was having plastic surgery?"

"Yes by a doctor Sloan from New York."

George's eyes grew wide. He quickly looked down.

"You know him? Is he good?" Lynne Anderson asked nervously.

Everyone in the room looked up at George.

"Um, he, uh, he-he's very good, at plastic surgery, yes."

"What's wrong?" Lynne said with a nervous expression.

"Nothing I have to go."

Yes, things were going to get _very _messy.

SCENE 6-Repetition

Meredith and Derek are sitting at Joe's Bar. Both have a drink in hand, a few empty ones sitting next to them.

"It's good to see you two here together, getting along." Joe said to Meredith and George.

"Yes, don't tell Addi though, I don't think shell like it." Derek said winking.

"I thought you guys were going the 'just friends' route?" Joe asked.

"Precisely" Meredith slurred.

"Ya know I really want cheese cake right now," Derek said looking into Meredith's eyes with the all too familiar glint.

"And perhaps a Ferry Boat ride couldn't hurt," Meredith replied throwing down some money on the table. As Derek and Meredith got up and left, Joe couldn't help remembering he had seen this scene before, about a year ago. He just wondered what would happen this time.

SCENE 7

Izzie sat straight up in bed. Looking around, she notices where she is. Suddenly someone clears their throat. The chief is standing right in front of her.

"Nice nap Ms. Stevens?"

"I was off duty sir. I didn't realize I had fallen asleep."

"Regardless, you did. I need to talk to you in my office."

Izzie and Dr. Webber enter his office.

"Look, I know it was inappropriate, I didn't mean for it to happen. I just was-"

"Izzie, I can see you falling for him. I know we can't help we fall for. It just happens. We get caught in the moment, and don't think clearly. Sometimes, this can lead to things we don't want to happen. Things that mess us up."

"Chief, what are you saying?"

"Izzie, I think it would be best if you were just taken off the case."

"What? Please I promise it won't happen again."

"Once he gets his heart and recovers, you can see him, but until then, he's completely off limits, I don't even want to see you in his room. You may say goodbye during your next shift. But then I don't want to see you with him. You get too involved, Izzie."

Izzie leaves the room, wiping her tears. How could she have let this happen?

SCENE 8

Christina, exhausted, walks into her apartment. Burke is sitting there, at the table, food has gone cold. Burke is clearly upset and saddened.

"Christina, you're late, where the hell were you?"

"Work, Okay?" Christina retaliates.

"Well, I had this dinner made, I sat here for an hour and a half!"

"Bailey wanted me to check on a patient, I'm sorry I had to work. I'm going to bed." Christina said, clearly upset. Burke realizes this and walks up and puts his arms around her.

"I'm sorry. What's wrong, you can tell me."

"No, it's not a big deal; it's something I did a long time ago, just let me go to bed."

"Christina, we share a house, we sleep in the same bed. I think I deserve to know what is going on with you. You can trust me." Burke yelled, hurt at Christina's secrecy.

"Look, its just been a long day, alright? Ill talk about it later."

Christina turned away, wiping stinging tears from her eyes, trying to block out the memories.

SCENE 9

"Hey Mark! I'll help with your luggage." Addison said, cheerfully as she could for the late night hours. She didn't even remember that her husband was still MIA, but she didn't mind. Mark was here. He walked up and hugged her, Addison held back.

"So, where's Derek? Find him yet, or his he still gallivanting around doing whatever, or whomever as the case may be?"

"Yeah. I was trying to forget about it. I don't think he's out with anyone. I'm sure he's just held up late at the hospital."

"He didn't call?"

"Well, no. But like I said, I'm sure he just got held up at the hospital."

"Right. So, I'm hungry, and could use a drink. Is there anywhere good around here? Isn't there like a Joe's or something?"

"Yeah. I could use a drink myself."

Addison and Mark enter Joe's, they sit down.

"Addison, is that Mark?" Joe whispered quietly as he Mark hung up their coats.

"Yeah, why?"

"Interesting seeing you two here. Very interesting."

"May I ask why?" Before Joe had to lie, Mark sat down. They both ordered and got their drinks.

"So, Mark, what's this case you were asked to be on?" Addi asked, hoping to catch him in a lie.

"Well, this boy, Ryan I think his name is, got in a bike accident. He's an aspiring singer; the family wants me to fix his face."

"Oh. That sounds interesting." Said Addi clearly disappointed. Before he came here to win her back, was he really over her this time? Addi took a sip of her drink before continuing. "Things here have been a little dull recently, but at least me and Derek's relationship is fine again."

"Addison, but I'm not going to lie. I also came here to win you back." Her heart dropped. She would once more have to pick between her husband and her soul mate.

SCENE 10

Izzie was driving home. Tears in her eyes. She didn't want to cry. She knew that showed her weakness. It was raining out, the metronome of the windshield wipers kept her mind on the road. Not on Denny. Everything was peaceful. Suddenly her phone rang loudly, startling her. She jumped and saw the caller id. What did George want, she saw him before she went to get Den—she cut herself off. She wouldn't think of him.

"Yeah?" Izzie answered, her voice clearly shaking.

"Izzie what's wrong. Wait, before you say anything… MARKS COMING BACK!"

"What?" Izzie pulled over, she had just swerved and missed another car by inches. She needed to focus on this conversation. "Do we tell Meredith?"

"I don't know, that's why I called you."

"Meet me at Joe's we can discuss it there. I'm seriously going to need a drink after today. I got taken off Denny's case. I fell asleep on his bed." Izzie stated, her voice was shaking, she was holding in tears, and her throat was burning.

"Iz, I'm so sorry. Ill see you at Joe's in fifteen minutes."

"Thanks George. Bye." Izzie said. As soon as she shut the phone, she started to sob. Somehow admitting it to George was admitting it to herself. She laid her head on the steering wheel and let the tears come, soon she sat up. Drying her tears with her red shirt, she turned around and headed toward Joe's, not realizing going there was going to cause more drama, not save her from it.

SCENE 11

After walking to the store, Meredith and Derek bought a cheesecake, all for themselves. The lid is open and both are eating forkfuls of it, clearly drunk. They sit on a bench in a park. The moon is reflecting of the wet grass, and the rain has stopped. A quiet breeze is in the air, and it is blowing through their hair. After a few minutes of silence, Derek begins:

"You know, I still love her. A lot."

"Yeah, but Derek, she cheated on you."

"Yes, and that hurt. But she came back, and tried to fix things, that meant a lot to me." Derek glances over at Meredith; she sticks her fork into the cheesecake, obviously not knowing what to say. "I still love you, nothing can change that. But I'm married. There has to be rules we can't get carried away. It's not fair to you, and I know of hurt you in ways that I can't imagine." He glances over, Meredith is still nibbling on cheesecake, tears are forming in her eyes, and she is trying to blink them back. "Meredith, all I want to do is be with you, but after 11 years of marriage, I can't just walk away. I've said this to Addison, and I'm going to tell you it now. You weren't a fling, and you weren't revenge. Because I'm staying with her doesn't mean I stop loving you." Meredith stands up.

"Derek, you're married. Telling me this doesn't change that. So what you love me? Addison is still there, lying in her bed right now, wondering where you are. Nothing you can say changes that." Meredith turns and begins to walk away, tears are streaming down her face; she doesn't even bother to wipe them away, she wraps her arms around her self. Suddenly, her knees collapse from underneath herself, and she finds herself kneeling on the ground sobbing. Derek walks towards her. He grabs her hand and helps her up and holds one of her hands, with the other he wipes away her tears. Their faces are almost touching, and they can feel each other's breath on their face.

"You're right, nothing I can say will change that," he whispers. He leans in and kisses her passionately on the lips.

SCENE 12

Addison and Mark are sitting at Joe's talking chatting, more and more glasses are piling up around them, and they're laughing, but clearly keeping their distance. Izzie arrives in the parking lot, eyes still red from crying. George is standing outside the door under a bench, in the drizzling rain is pouring, his hair is wet and sticking to his face. Izzie walks up.

"George, why are you standing out here, it's pouring, and not to mention freezing?"

"Iz, just go inside and see." Izzie gets a puzzled look on her face.

"Why can't you come in with me? What is going on?"

"Just go," George opened the door. The bell dinged, but no one noticed inside the cozy bar. Izzie stepped in, welcomed by its light and warmth. Suddenly she saw them. Mark and Addison, sitting by the bar, clearly having drank more than the suggested amount. Her jaw dropped. She ran back outside.

"George was that--"

"Addison and Mark"

"And were they--"

"Drunk."

"So what do we—"

"Do now? I don't know. How can we do this without hurting anyone?" George asked. Neither knew an answer. Saying anything to Addison would offend her, but she needed to know to watch her back. If she did anything with Mark, that could ripple and mess up Meredith and Derek's friendship. Izzie suddenly got an idea; it was the perfect way to accomplish exactly what they needed to.

SCENE 13

Mark and Addison finish their last round of drinks. He helps her up, and puts her coat on her. Before they leave, he quickly runs off to the bathroom. Addison, feeling a bit chilled, sticks her hands in her coat pocket, and pulls out a note.

_We know he has come back from New York. Be careful_

_Sincerely, _

_A friend of a friend_

Mark came back over, and seeing her stuff the note inside her pocket inquired about it.

"Dry cleaning receipt. I really need to clean out my pockets from time to time." They giggled. Walking to his car, he put his hand around Addison's waist, not considering what he was doing, it felt so right. He opened the passenger door for her, and helped her inside. Starting his car, he began to drive towards Addison's home. Drunk

Meanwhile:

Meredith and Derek finished their kiss. They started to walk along the path in the park. Derek turned to face Meredith, his face had a look of pensive concentration, as if trying to remember this moment, their being together, no matter how temporary it may be.

"Derek, tonight should be happy. We have tonight for ourselves, let's enjoy it. What about that ferryboat ride?"

"The ferryboats are closed this time of night." Meredith cracked a smile

"What a shame, it's intense. This thing I have for ferryboats, I mean." They giggled. Walking to his car, he put his hand around Meredith's waist, not considering what he was doing, it felt so right. He opened the passenger door for her, and helped her inside. Starting his car, he began to drive towards Meredith's home. Drunk.

\

SCENE 14

Alex is sitting up in bed, his head in his hands. The small t.v.sitting on his dresser is turned on, lighting up his room with gentle flashes. He sighs and leans back, after lying on his side for a few minutes, he looks at his phone. He picks it up and opens it. He dials a number and it rings. Izzie's voicemail comes on again. He slams the phone down on the dresser, and returns his head to his hands. After a few more moments, his phone starts to vibrate; he grabs it and answers it.

"Where the hell were you, I called you like 10 times," Alex said as he hostilely opened the phone.

"Look, Alex, I am sorry, something happened, I just got your messages, but wh-"

"What came up? Or should I say who? Izzie, it better not be Denny?"

"Look, Alex, I just can't deal with you now. Mark came back."

"What? How do you know?"

"I have to go, Alex. I'm sorry. Bye"

Izzie hung up the phone, Alex threw the phone across the room. Why didn't Izzie understand how much he cared about her.

SCENE 15

Christina is laying in bed, on her side, the blankets pulled up to her head, although her eyes are closed, a tear finds its way through, and silently falls down her face. Burke is also laying there, after a moment, he turns over, Christina's back is turned toward him. He sits up, and rubs his face. Leaning to Christina, he whisper's:

"I just wish I knew how to help you, knew what was wrong." He gets up and out of the room, silently, shuts the door, and starts to make some coffee. As soon as the door is shut, Christina sits up and walks over to the closet. Opening the door, pulls out a box filled with books. She digs through, and pulls out a small, worn, unassuming one. Flipping to a certain page, she pulls out a picture. Christina and her friend are standing next to each other, both in Stanford sweatshirts. Their eyes are sunken in, and both are very skinny. They are in a dorm room, one of the beds has a pile of clothes and random item on it, the other is made neatly, with absolutely nothing on it. A few more tears fall, and they land on the picture. Suddenly the room is flooded with light as Burk enters.

"Christina-"

"Look, I was just, um. Burke, this was along time ago, I was young, and didn't no better." As she is speaking, Burke walks over to Christina, and peaks over her shoulder to see the picture.

"Who is she?"

"That's Anna, my college roommate. She was my best friend."

"Was?"

"Burke, she's dead."

SCENE 16

Meredith and Derek are sitting in the car quietly, the steady beat of the windshield wiper is apparent. The lighthearted mood is gone, and both have a pensive look on their face, thinking about all that had happened in the past year. Both opem their mouths to speak at the same time.

"Derek, I--"

"I was think—" Their eyes lock for a moment, both realizing they had something important to say.

"Look, Derek, I need to speak first, before I… you change my mind." Her eyes are filling with tears, and her throat felt heavy. "Derek, we can't. It's not right." The tears begin to fall, but she doesn't wipe them away, but persists in what she is saying. "She's laying at home right now, worried sick about you. She's laying in an empty bed, probably clutching her phone, wondering why dinner has taken five hours, why you didn't say where you were going." The tears were streaming down her face as fast as ever, she pauses, and wipes a few tears, although her new tears replace the old. "Derek, I want to be with you, but I can't. It's not right, your'e married. It's always been wrong, from that first night at the bar, the time in the elevator, when you lived with me. Every day it was a lie. I can't do it Derek, I can't be the dirty mistress, I just can't."

"Meredith-"

"No, Derek. No. Take me home, tomorrow I will go back to being Dr. Meredith Grey, and you will just be my boss, Dr. Shepherd, who is happily married. Take me home, and let me get over it, get over us."

The two drive on in silence, the raindrops on the windshield match the tears sliding down both of their faces.

SCENE 17

After Izzie snuck the note inside Addi's pocket, the friends walk across the street to the hospital. They walked over to one of the giant windows, and sat on the windowsill. Although they were sheltered from the calm rain, the wind still blew through their hair. After a few moments of silence, Izzie deeply sighs, and looks at George.

"George, I'm sorry."

"For what?" George looked at her quizzically.

"For what I did to Callie. For what happened with Meredith. For everything. Look I was jealous. George, over the past year, you've become my best friend, no one else gets me like you do. Since this whole Denny thing, I've realized how much I needed your shoulder to cry on, you are all I have left. Alex is mad at me, and Meredith has enough of her own problems to worry about mine. I am jealous of Callie, you're her McDreamy, her everything, and after that night, you know, with Meredith, everything changed. It was like she broke you, you were sad, and I understand. But George, move back in. Move back to our, you buying the tampons, using each other's toothbrushes, laying under the Christmas tree, friendship. George, life hasn't been the same since you've gone." Izzie's eyes are filled with tears, shes looking up to the clouds to try to keep them from falling, but one escapes from her eye. George leans over and wipes it off her face.

"It's not that simple, Iz." He walks away, and Izzie is left there staring at her best friend leave her when she needed him most.

SCENE 18

Addison and Mark are in the car, the mood has become dismal. The rain is apparent as it beats on the roof. Mark pulls up to the trailer and stops. Mark begins to speak, but decides against it. Deciding on something better to say, he opens his mouth.

"So, you're sure it's alright that I borrow your car while I am here? Derek won't mind?"

"Yes, Mark it's fine." Addison begins to leave; she unbuckles her seatbelt, and grabs her purse from her feet. Just as she is about to step outside in the now drizzling rain, Mark realizes it is now or never.

"Addison, look, I love you. I am sorry how everything is happening, but I can't help the fact I do. Ever since you left New York, I've been lost, wondering what to do with myself. I tried dating other people, but they all fizzled out, there was no light. The sparkle left my eye the minute you boarded that plane. Addison I jus-"

"No. Don't. I can't. He's laying in there, wondering where I am. I can't do this to him again Mark. He took me back, he forgave me. I just can't put him through it again." Addison slammed the car door shut and walked into the rain. She didn't look back, knowing if she saw Mark's face she'd turn around. As she approached the trailer, she noticed all the lights were off. She slid her key into the lock, and entered the tiny kitchen/living room. No Derek. She walked into the little bedroom. No Derek. With a last bit of hope, she knocked on the bathroom. No Derek. With a sudden mix of confusion, she ran back outside into the now downpour. Holding her hand over her eyes, she saw that her car was still there with Mark in it. She saw him look up. Mark slowly got out of the car, and walked toward Addison. As he approached her, he began to speak,

"He's not here, is he?"

"No" Addison said softly. A tear of loneliness slid down her face, mixing with the raindrops.

"Let's go inside, I'll make you some coffee." Mark took her hand, and led her inside.

They never got to the coffee.

SCENE 19

Derek and Meredith are still in the car. Both are very quiet, with miserable looks on their faces. Derek slowly pulls up to Meredith's house, as he had done many times before. He stops the car and gets out, and opens the door for Meredith. Together they slowly walk up the front steps, though the mood is not cheerful or light as it usually is. Derek has one hand shoved in his pocket, and the other running through his hair. Meredith is fumbling with her key, nervously feeling it's grooves. When she gets to the door they turn to each other. Derek speaks first:

"So, I guess this is really goodbye…" His head looks down, clearly saddened.

"Derek, what are you talking about? This isn't goodbye, I see you everyday at work" Meredith said, clearly confused what Derek was saying.

"No, I mean goodbye, to our relationship. You know nothing will go back to the same way it was before, I just wish" Derek stops himself and he gives one of his looks to Meredith. Her eyes let loose and she looks away out into the dark night, hiding her face and her tears from Derek.

"No, Derek, I can't. I've made up my mind. This is how it has to be, as much as us being apart hurts me, us being together hurts Addison more. I can't do that to her, I know what it's like to be the other girl," She looks up into Derek's eyes, "Don't make me change my mind. Let it end here."

Meredith slid the key into the door and flung it open, as she runs upstairs crying, you can see Derek through the glass door. He grabs the door handle and looks back inside at the stairs, then back at his hand clutching the knob. As a single tear rolls down his face, he lets go and walks back toward the car.

SCENE 20

Derek sat quietly in the car. The rain wasn't nearly so bad, so he did not need to pay as much attention to the road as he had before. His mind was racing with thoughts. _Could he have done anything? Could he have said something to change her mind? No,_ he thought, _she had her mind made up. She didn't want me to change it. _Derek pulled up to his trailer. _At least I still have Addison. _As he walked toward his home, he noticed everything was as it should be. Addison's car was in the driveway, all the lights were out. He walked into the front door, and into the kitchen. He noted there was a pot of coffee made, but none of it had been poured. _Odd, Addison must have been too tired to drink it._ Stepping closer to the door he saw a shirt. His stomach dropped, he never wore shirts like that. He placed his hand against the wall to keep from falling over. His head was spinning around, _No, not again! _He placed his hand on the door knob, holding back for just a minute. He swallowed some tears and silently opened the door.

There they were, Addison and Mark, lying under the covers, clearly naked, asleep. He sighed, and silently shut the door. Running his hand through his hair, he walked out to the car, and stepped inside. His mind zoned out as soon as he was on the road. His whole body felt numb. He pulled up to the docks, and got on a ferry.

Derek climbed up to the highest platform and leaned over the age. By now, the rain had stopped. He slowly took in a deep breath to clear his thoughts. Looking up into the cloudy sky made him dizzy. He sat down on the bench behind him, and placed his head in his hands, running them through his hair. After a minute, he sat up, and began to look around. He heard someone silently crying on the deck below. Unable to curb his curiosity, he inched over to the railing. Looking down, he recognized the girl,

"MEREDITH?"

SCENE 21

"Derek? W-What are you doing here?"

"I came here to think."

Meredith wiped away a few of her tears with her coat sleeve, she looked up. Although she already had a good idea what the answer was, she spoke because she wasn't sure what else to say,

"About wh-what?"

"Us. I mean My Marriage." Derek sighs, and gives a sheepish smile, "I guess both. Hang on, I'm coming down there." Derek quickly walked down the two flights of white stairs, still damp from the previous rain. Meredith scooted over on her bench, and Derek sat down next to her. She looked at him questioningly, and Derek took a deep breath before beginning,

"After you told me to leave, I felt hollow, like a part of me was forever gone. I just wanted to go home, and lay in bed forever. But then I remembered how Addison was probably there, wondering where I was. I felt guilty for even wanting anything to happen between us tonight. As I gt to my trailer, everything lookeds like it should. All the lights were off, Addi's car was parked out front. But when I stepped inside, I saw it again - Mark's shirt in the hallway, them in bed together. I thought it would hurt, ya know, the second time, but it didn't. I thought I would literally feel my heart breaking, but it didn't. They were both asleep. I saw it, and silently shut the door, and drove here. Thinking about it doesn't hurt this time, not as much as--"

Derek stopped himself, he shifted his position, and now instead of staring out into the skyline reflected into the water, he grabs Meredith's hands, and stares into her eyes, sighing.

"It didn't hurt as much as when you told me to leave, to forget about us. That hurt more than anything in my life ever has. More then Addison cheating on me, more than watching you fall apart after I chose her, more than learning about you and George. Meredith, tonight has shown me one thing. I don't love Addison, and I don't think I ever have. I was in love with the idea of being in love. But Meredith, you are the one I'm in love with, not her. I have been putting commitment over my heart for too long. I pick you, choose you. Meredith, I love you." Meredith begins to let the tears she has been holding in fall, as they hold each other in their arms and passionately kiss. Meredith breaks away, and quietly whispers,

"I love you too, Derek."


	2. Scene 22

SCENE 22

Cristina and Burke are sitting quietly on the couch. She has a blanket wrapped around her, and they both have a cup of coffee in their hands. Cristina is nervously shifting the mug between her hands. She finally takes a sip, and continues to twist the warm cup in her hands. Burke clears his throat, and they make eye contact.

"Cristina, I know this is hard. But, when you're ready, please tell me about what happened," Burke glances over, and notices Cristina's indifference to what he just said. "I'm only trying to help."

Cristina quickly glances up, but returns her focus to the same coffee mug. She still twisting it back and forth, debating whether or not to talk. A few moments of silence go by and Burke sighs and stands up, and begins toward the kitchen. Before he makes it there, Cristina softly begins to talk,

"Stanford College. It was a dream since I was young, since I knew what college was. It was the goal, the thing I worked towards through high school, even through elementary school; Stanford was the light at the end of the tunnel. The day I found out I was accepted, was the happiest day of my life. I soon got there, and began my studies. My roommate was a girl named Anna. We had similar backgrounds, and both had wanted to go to Stanford for as long as we could remember, the only difference was out tidiness, or lack there of," Cristina was rambling, she knew, but she smirked as she remembered their dorm room. "My bunk usually had pounds of junk piled on top, and all over the floor. Her half of the space was grossly tidy, she said she couldn't work unless everything was just so. I used to drive her nuts. We worked our asses off, and only got mediocre grades. Sure, they weren't bad, but I was valedictorian, and she was salutatorian of our high schools, so to us, we were failing. There just wasn't enough time in the day," Cristina's face turned grim, as the heartbreaking part of her story began. "One day, she got back from class, 'Cristina!' Anna had said, 'I have it, the solution to our problems!' I joked back, 'What the cure for cancer, or is it the common cold?' Then she pulled out the caffeine pills. They worked great, but pretty soon, one didn't tide me over, I needed two. Then two didn't work so well, but three got me through fine. As the months progressed, we both became more and more dependant on those pills." Cristina stopped; she sighed, and shaking, took another sip of her coffee. "It was two weeks before Christmas break, we had exams. I had gone to the library to review with a friend from one of my classes, and Anna had stayed back in our dorm to review there. It was going to be another cramming night. Pizza, pop, studying, and of course the pills. I left the library, and walked to my Dorm. When I entered, there she was, lying there, dead. She had over dosed on caffeine pills." Cristina again stopped her story, this time to dry the tears trickling down her face. "I felt so guilty. I KNEW what they did, why didn't I stop her and myself. At her funeral, I realized, her life was chasing this dream, this dream of being a doctor. She killed herself from working to hard. It was that moment, at her funeral mass, that I decided I would work twice as hard, but without those pills. I threw every single one out, and got to work. Most of the time I didn't make it to bed, but instead slept with my head on the books. I made it through med school for her, my best friend. I finished first. On our graduation date, I went to her grave. I sat there, by myself, and told her about what she had missed, and how this wasn't just my diploma, but hers to. Everything I am I owe to her, she showed me what was important was not only the goal, but getting there." Cristina finished. Her eyes were read and watery, but she was no longer crying. She felt light. No one else knew that story, how she had used the pills too, how she visited the grave, everything. Burke knowingly sat next to her, and wrapped his arms around her, offering her the only comfort he could.


End file.
